My Wild Horse Riding Days

Steven and I had recently visited his parents. The last few days we were there a surprise to us all was an unexpected delivery of horses to the home we were staying at. The family who was sharing their home with us had a friend come by with 4 horses and 2 foals to let graze on their land. From what I heard was these horses hadn't been ridden in a while nor been around people in a while either, but they were suppose to be friendly, docile horses. 


Since I felt I was experienced enough as a rider and everyone didn't seem to care if I rode the horses or not, I had Steven come out with me one fine evening to bribe the horses to come to us with apples. However, I only focused on the horse I planned on riding, yeah, that one in the picture below with the halter on.

I had also got it in my head that obviously the horse with the halter was probably the one ridden more... or the leader of the small herd. Leader I have no doubt about, but there is no way I could have proved this one had been well ridden. And in the back of my head was the wise advice my Uncle Mark had given me years ago, "Meri, never trust a horse that you don't know." Of course that means, "Meri, expect to be bucked off when climbing on a horse you don't know," and that's what I figured would happen with this horse. Thankfully Steven was helpful in this risky event.

Ta'dah! Steven hasn't been around horses. In fact his first riding on one was back in June. But he was a trooper in lending me his knee and keeping the horse steady enough while I swung my leg up and over.

Of course I would have loved to have had a bridal on the horse for more control, but this is what I get for climbing on a horse without any real permission. Now don't be confused, though I was riding the horse, it was the horse who took me for a ride.

She was a good horse. She'd stop and go on command but the rest was up to were she wanted to go, which consisted mainly of going back and fourth between the other horses that were somewhat spread out. She tried to trot, but with my experience on horses, if they are agitated and go faster, they'll buck. I only rode her for roughly 10 minutes. I would have loved to have continued, but I felt I'd been pressing my luck. We decided to go see puppies instead!

We told the other family about my short ride and they were nothing but impressed and asking how I liked the ride. The horse I road is a Tennessee Walker, which means they naturally have a more smooth gate (walk, trot, gallop). I told them I didn't trot and they said she was fine for that. So the next morning before Steven and I left for home, I went out for one final ride. I didn't force her to trot, but she did a little on her own. She even spooked herself by getting to close to the wire. I got a few seconds of a Gallop before she halted to my," WHOA!" and I slid into her neck. It was exciting, but she really was a good horse. Never bucked and was patient with my less than graceful getting on her that morning. I do think she was testing me that morning too because she paced more fervently between the horses, turning suddenly, and getting as close to the fence and other horses in what I assume to be her seeing how skilled of a rider I was. I just enjoyed the ride she took me for and hope I'll get to see her again :)

2:15 In the Afternoon

2:15
Is it really?
How did I get so behind
Time slips by 
With the games I play
How'd I become so blind?
This procrastination
Sadly can't be 
Rushed over little time.
So from behind
I must try
To regain what is mine.

The Lovely Bones Dreams

I was at my house and I saw on the TV a dance happening. The lady I live with says she wishes she could dance again and I begin walking away with the thrill that once I was in a Modern Dance class in High School. As I walk away, I began to dance. I then was in the performance.

The room was dark and somehow I knew exactly what to do. I was running around in an all red suit, leaping and twirling ads though there was some grand celebration happening. Another person partnered with me and as one point we quickly ran toward another pair of people and grabbed their hands. We began pulling and I knew it to be us interpretive dancing about Mitosis. We turned as we pulled against each other and I and my partner reached out our hand to a lady who would help pull us apart. But once the pull became strong, I and my partner some how got pulled apart.I quickly ran through my people knowing this was the dramatic moment in the dance. I didn't know how to save my other half, but I tried to maneuver around  without being caught.

Finally there was this person, who was talk and draped in a light robe that glowed as the light poured down upon him. It reminds me of a Grim Reaper, but bright in a dark way. My partner was there and they were about to send her away. I sprinted to do my part and grabbed on to the Grim Reaper's arm saying no. I then began to be engulfed in light. It got brighter and I was teleported.

I woke up on my back in an oddly familiar room, though for the life of me I don't know why I recognized it. Him... it was similar to Ikan's parents living room. Anywho, I found myself striving to gain breathe underneath the desk. I realized there that I was Susie Salmon and I just figured out how to get out of the Inbetween. I was home.

I could see my parents saw me and instructed my sisters (yeah.. I had two apparently) to go to their room. I finally gasped in many needed breathes, as though I was drowning and finally broke the surface of the water. I finally got up and tried pretending like I didn't just get revived from the dead. I casually mentioned I had taken a bunch of pictures while I was in New Zealand and my father responded that when he got the money he'd develop the pictures for me.

Then I was back on my parents couch as though I had woken up. It was dark and my parents where in the kitchen. I looked around and it was dark and eerie. I knew I wanted to write about the dream I just had so went to the computer to write. The clock on the wall said  it was 2:30 (2:20 since it was 10 minutes fast). At the computer, the screen said 7:25. I moved the mouse around to refresh the page and then it jumped to 3:25. I quickly looked at the wall clock and realized I miss read the clock and it was 3:35 now. I jumped up and got my shoes on and zipped out the door.

It was dark and wet outside with some random fireworks lighting up the sky. My keys were being impossible to use in my hurry. At the car door I found I didn't lock my car so I quickly jumped in and finally was able to use my car key in the ignition. I began to zip down my street. As I remembered my car door was unlocked I decided to check my rear view mirror to make sure no one was in back. There was.

I swerved over nearly hitting a car and got out very fast. I yelled at the man to get out. He did calmly and looked ashamed for surprising me so terribly.  He was older than me, like in his 50's. He said he had an interest in old cars. As he walked away I  was feeling bad for making him seem like a bad guy and expressed I wouldn't mind chatting more later if we saw each other in the neighbor hood. He smiled and I continued my rushed trek to work. I thought about calling to warn them I'd be late, but I figured I would only be one or two minutes late anyways.

Then... I woke up for reals and saw it was really 2:45. And here I am really trying to get read for work before I'm late XD

George Clooney is in Love With Me

I know, it took me by surprise too. Who would have thought George Clooney would be in love with a simple girl like me? We met at McGrath's Fish house- well... more on the way there. I was walking through the Common's parking lot and suddenly this sharp dressed, older man, who appeared to be in his 50's or 60's, stepped out of a car. I was feeling particularly happy that evening, a skip in my step. I had on my green skirt and one of my favorite tops. Out of the corner of my eye I could see that the man had taken interest in me.

"Well, aren't we in a fine mood this evening, Miss," he addressed me, stepping to my side. I put on a coy smile as though he figured out a secret of mine.

"Why shouldn't I be?" I replied.

"I suppose it has something to do with you being a taken woman," he said ever so charmingly.

"Ah," I said, a chill coming over me as I remembered I was engaged. Yet I felt compelled to belittle the commitment I had promised my betrothed, "Well, I'm not taken yet. Still looking for my Prince Charming in the sea of fish," I caught myself saying. My stomach churned as I realized the kind of person I was acting like. I was behaving like a gold digger. Besides, I didn't even know who the guy was yet.

To my surprise and secret pleasure, the man took hope to that. Before I knew it, he took my hand and continued to escort me into McGrath's. A moment of nervousness swept over me; that feeling of 'I'm about to get caught' lit my mind on fire. However I pushed past the fear and continued to allow the man to escort me to a table.

The man  held my chair out for me before taking his seat. We chatted for a moment, I clearly saying things that amused him. After a time, it was clear the man was smitten by me. I knew this because he suddenly confessed that he had something to show me. He ruffled his hair, undid his shirt (I know, scandalous), rubbed his face, and shook his legs a little. As he did this, I suddenly saw George Clooney standing before me. In his eyes I could see a sincere man very taken by me for whatever reason and desperately asking me to to choose him over my fiancee.

Of course, just as things were really beginning to get interesting, I woke up. What I want to know is why it was I was having a dream about George Clooney. No offence to Mr. Clooney, but he's not the first guy that would come to mind when thinking about hot celebrities I'd want to meet. Apparently some subconscious crush has revealed itself to me.

He Proposed!

 *SQQUUUEEEEEAAAALLLLLL!!!*

Talk about out of nowhere! I knew it was coming up, but wow, it was suddenly here! Steven and I had talked about rings and what not about 2 weeks ago and last weekend (the 8th) went and got our fingers measured. I knew I was going to have to work harder on giving him more free time if I ever wanted him to get a ring soon and without him asking for alone time. I had just told the Kindergarteners I work with about what an engagement means Friday the 7th (one of them getting so excited I was going to marry my boyfriend <though he hadn't formally asked yet>) and just told one of my co-workers yesterday about how I was expecting the engagement to happen at the end of this month or sometime in February.

But here it was, yesterday night, STEVEN POPPED THE QUESTION! Unfortunately he used my promise ring (claiming he wanted to get the ring first, but tonight was too perfect). He wants us to go back to Zales again this weekend to get the real thing.

From of what I heard this was Steven's reasons for why it had to have happened last night:

He woke up just feeling extra lovey that day. I'd say it must be that super happy feeling one gets and everything in your brain about life makes sense and the thought of nothing could go wrong all about you. Upon feeling like that, my promise ring was at his house cuz I was silly and forgot it there (seriously). He suspected I had planned to come over that night as well. With all the snow drama work was letting him off early. The snow was falling in that perfect amount that was enjoyable (if not magical) to walk through (though that was more of a bonus since it began snowing just before dinner) and it was 1/11/11, he knew he couldn't pass up this opportunity that was laid out before him.

Now back to my side of things. I woke up feeling no different. I had already planned to go see Ikan that night but had to accomplish my goals for the day: Work, Job Hunt, Work. Surprisingly during my job hunting I got a call. I was glad to have heard my phone vibrating in my coat pocket about 10 feet away and eagerly jumped up to answer it (hoping it was a job inquiry). Unfortunately it wasn't :( But it was Steven! He called to let me know about the early leave that they were having. Instead of 5:30 they could leave at 4. I was excited that we'd have a longer hang out, but Steven suspected that the traffic would be horrible with everyone trying to beat the snow home. I was still optimistic that he'd be home plenty early still. But before he hung up, Ikan says, "Happy 11 anniversary." I thought it was cute he remembered the day of the month we first met on. I had decided not to say 'Happy (# months) Anniversary' anymore since we've been together over a year and felt it'd be redundant. I'll mention something on half and whole year anniversaries though since those seem more appropriate now.

Anyways, during my second shift of work, I was relaying my weekend to one of my co workers. Like I had said, I was giving her my assumptions of when the proposal might happen and she's real excited for me. As I left I saw Steven had called around 3:45 and was already at the bus station to head home. There still wasn't any snow, so I was pretty sure Steven might beat me to his house. Sure enough he had... by like 30 seconds.

Once in and hello's exchanged, Steven asks what I'd like to do tonight. I listed off a few ideas like games, cook dinner, and a movie. I then ask what he wanted to do and he says that it's a surprise. I'm thinking, "what?" and of course am intrigued by the mystery. I tried to pester it out of him, but instead he says he'd like to go out to eat tonight, somewhere nice though. I told him I didn't have any money on me but he persisted and said he'd pay. He asked where I'd like to go that was around the Commons. I listed off a few that he liked as well but he had me make the final choice. Since I was hankering for bread sticks, we went to the Olive Garden.

As he drove us there, the snow began to descend from the sky. In between small talk I'm wondering why Steven was feeling like going out to eat tonight. Yes the thought of this could be the proposal went through my head, but I thought, "No way! There was only one day we didn't see each other after getting our fingers measured and from the sounds of it I don't think he went out last night. Okay Meri, just stay cool. This most likely has to be just a nice date. And even if it is, maybe that means a second dinner is in the future," mused my greedy head.

Dinner came and went, in which we saw some members of Dash Point Ward. During dinner I noticed my naked finger and mentioned to Steven that I forgot to put the promise ring on when we were at the house. He just said it was funny I forgot but assured me it was safe. For dessert we went to Menchi's and got Apple Pie and Mango with Mochi bits, fudge and marshmallow sauce. It was so tasty!

Now with all the falling snow, Steven told me we were going to get our walkies in. He wouldn't tell me where. My head went on a daydream to Redondo's Boardwalk, thinking how cute would it be for him to propose there. Instead we went to the Commons and parked. I was getting very suspicious now. Still, I was trying to be every bit in denial since it seemed too soon for him to ask.

For you, the reader, walking around in the snow at the mall may not be the most picturesque places you can think of for a proposal, but I assure you, Steven chose the perfect spot.

We walked around the parking lot and into Target to warm up some. After doing a lap around the store we headed back to the car. As we approached his car, Steven asks, "Do you know why I chose this place for us to walk?" My romantic head of course knew the significance of the place we were at. "Yes," I said, "This was where we walked on our first date," we then began to walk around his car, "and this was when you began to point out all the dents and scratches and told me the stories for each one," now we were behind his car, "and this is where you pulled me into a slow dance that misty night." Steven then adds, "Yes, but now I'm a better dancer," and with that begins to waltz me in circles right there. We even sang  The Dog Days Are Over by Florence + The Machine while we hustled. It was great fun and thankfully neither of us slipped on the snow.

I beamed with how cute everything was. Snow falling everywhere, Steven remembering the details of our first date, singing, dancing and in the midst of kisses Steven begins to tell me all the amazing things I am to him. It was happening, no denying. I was so happy to hear how important I was to him, and though I could type out every word he said, I'll share the last line:

"I can't stand the thought of not being with you, so I want you to know (through my watery eyes I see him kneel down) will you, Meri, me?" 

There in front of me is my promise ring in his hand. I laughed at first thinking, "Duh! He would take opportunity of me forgetting my ring." Of course I said yes and in triumph he lifts me up and spins me around. The proposal was everything I thought it would be. I am proud to say I'm engaged to Steven! He is the love of my life (no matter how short lived it has been so far) and couldn't have asked for a better guy. 

So there you have it. I'm the future Mrs. Kopsa. May the wedding day come swiftly now (which might be 11/11/11 <our 2 year> or April/May 2012 <when his bro is home>).

Another Nightmare :/

This one didn't have that overwhelming feeling once I woke up. I was on my bed sleeping and suddenly a dark entity I couldn't see lifted me up. It felt real and in the dream I recognized it to be the same demon from previous nightmares. It pulled me into the corner above my bed and despite feeling scared at first I felt myself dare it to do it's worst. I braced myself for whatever beating was to come upon me but then I fell back onto the bed. I could feel the darkness in my room stir with the unknown spirits about me and finally I went to my mum's room.


Oddly enough I didn't have that fear of waking her (like I usually do) and walked right to her bed and woke her up. I told her that I have been having these nightmares and now I believe the dreams are becoming true. I gave the details and my mum looked very concerned, but more in the "what has my daughter done!?"


I woke up after that point (or I forgot what happened next) and enjoyed the warmth of my bed. I looked out the window and saw no snow meaning I still had work in an hour. As I rolled back over to enjoy the warmth a few more minutes I then remembered the dream. I am curious why my head has taken such an interest in this dark entity. Like, Paranormal Activity was awesome to have seen, so why am I now having sporadic nightmares about dark demons? Is there something in my life that I feel I have no control over yet I am fighting to defy it? I just don't get it.