Greatest Love

This past week has been AWESOME! First, Steven and I were able to get a freezer. Thankful because now we can go back to making frozen dinners and buying bulk meat. Huge thanks to my father for taking time out of his busy week to help with that. Apparently he and my mother have been working feverishly on getting the paint on the house stripped and repainted. Here's hoping they were able to accomplish that despite the rain that has now set back in.

Thursday was my 25th birthday. It was a very pleasant day. Received lots of birthday wishes in the forms of phone calls, birthday cards, text and facebook messages. Steven was able to slip a gift in while I wasn't looking and made for a great surprise. It's a kite! A big one! Yes I do love kites. There's something about the challenge of getting it up, especially while living at the apartments, when the wind isn't 100% cooperative. We were going to try it out this weekend, but we vetoed that due to something else we had to do.

My sister, Emily, then treated me to breakfast and the Zoo. It was particularly fun going to the Zoo because I had my little girl that I Nanny now with us. She got in for free and promptly slept through the majority of the visit. Then that night Steven says the other part of his gift to me was to sit and watch Twilight: Breaking Dawn part 2. We had a blast watching it. There were parts we had fun poking fun at which made the movie that more fun. For those of you cringing at the thought of Twilight, the 5th movie is by far the best. The other's are at best okay.

Anyways, Friday I went and paid a visit to my last job. I was mostly looking forward to seeing my little babies. Oh man have they grown and this was probably the best thing I've ever experienced. I knew there was a great chance that my babies were gonna be forgetting me very soon. I had seen them 2 weeks prior and they seemed to kinda remember me, but with the parents there and all the people at the talent show, it wasn't too surprising they didn't give me much attention. But Friday, 3 of my 4 babies recognized me the best. These three are now in toddlers and ALL three of them are walking! It was so cute to see them moving around. The part that filled my heart with so much joy was when I called their names and all three of them saw me and their faces lit up. They then walked/crawled as fast as they could to get to me and I had to make room for 3 cuddly babies who all seemed surprised and very happy to see me. I nearly cried at how much they seemed to have missed me and boy I can't wait to go back!

With the pump of that love, I don't think the rest of the day could have done any wrong. But I must say, nothing terrible happened anyways. In fact that night I ended up giong to Seattle to meet up with a friend. I had wanted to go to another friends to watch America's Next Top Model, but unfortunately with Steven wanting the car and her folks being gone it just didn't work out. So Seattle was the next choice in which I got to catch up with another friend whom we haven't had much of a chance to see each other lately. We enjoyed walking about the city, bought some stuff and ate a fabulous dinner at one of my favorite restaurant, the List. Couldn't do Pike Place or any other sites due to the lateness we got together (bus and traffic being the main reason for the lateness).

Saturday Steven and I had planned on flying the kite he got me, but we had talks to prepare. All week we had been pondering our topics, but with Steven doing OT (60 hour week), we had little time at home to really sit down and focus on it. So Saturday became our cram day. He finished his before me, but through distractions and the need to step away ever so often when I got stuck, I completed my first 15 minute talk at 12:30am this morning :D Okay it was 14 minutes total, and I was hoping that I would remain calm and composed and not speed read my talk making it suddenly 10 minutes or less. Long story short, I gave my talk with few mistakes and only shaved off about 2 minutes though my nervous rush. For those who'd like to read my talk, click here or scroll down if you are still in the main feed of the home tab.

Anyways, like I said, it's been a great week. 25 hasn't been so bad so far. I hope everyone had a great week and those in Western Washington may the storm I hear happening outside not harm any of you.

<3

Talk on "The Savior Wants to Forgive"

Good morning Brothers and Sisters. For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Meriam Kopsa. I typically respond to Meri, but either is just fine. Steven and I have been in the ward nearly 3 months now, having previously moved from SeaTac, WA and we so far love it here. We’ve been married for nearly 2 wonderful years and am thankful we still have eternity to go. I would go into details about how we met, but I assure you Steven recalls our first date far better than I do. (And those chuckling out there obviously agree). It’s been about 8 years since I’ve given a talk, so I’m hoping to put to use all I learned in Speech 101 a few years back when I was in college since I am no public speaker. I pray the spirit of my message will be understood in case I speak too fast or jumble what I have written to share with you.

But first a little about me since I am new to the ward and have not yet been able to acquaint myself to each of you. I am an artist in many forms; drawing, music, and dancing, to name a few, are my favorites and strongest of talents. I was born and raised in Washington to a family that promoted my artistic expression and raised me up in the gospel. Though artistic, I’ve pursued after the profession of childcare which my personality thrives in, since I’m silly and creative. I have a love for animals which has been healthfully nurtured by my parents since they both are veterinarians. I also just turned 25 and noted 2 things about being half way up the hill; I still don’t know everything and I’m still not perfect. It sometimes looks like I’ll be forever making mistakes and sinning. Thankfully we have a loving Heavenly Father with a plan so you and I can return to him someday. It just so happens that I’ve been asked to talk on the message given in April’s General Conference by Elder Craig A Cardon, “the Savior Wants to Forgive.”

For me, I find myself forgetting, from time to time, how much the Savior loves me and wants to forgive me. I let my guilt and negativity for faltering cloud my mind. I tend to find myself like Simba, from the Lion King, avoiding the issue and hoping something will come along and be my Rafiki; soundly whacking me on the head to remind me of who I am. I guess what I’m hinting at is, this seems to have been an inspired topic meant for me to talk about for the next 12 minutes. With that, I feel as though I’m to focus my talk on two ways we can remember that the Savior wants to forgive us.

The first way that I thought could help us remember that the Savior wants to forgive us is by ‘Remembering Who We Are.’ An Anonymous author in April’s 2008 Ensign wrote of her experience about a phrase her mother would say to her:

"It was around my 14th birthday when my mother started talking in code. Just as I would be running out the door, she would call out, “Remember who you are!” I wasn’t quite sure what she meant by that, but I would feign understanding and yell over my shoulder, “OK, Mom. Bye!”

I decided my mother’s message was the result of her being a registered nurse for about 25 years. Maybe she had seen children who had been left with amnesia after some horrible accident. She just wants me  to make sure that if I am ever hurt, I will remember my name and other vital information.

As I was growing up, life with my family was not always pleasant. After one particularly bad night, I remember staring at myself in the mirror, hardly recognizing the reflection staring back... Thoughts of running away crossed my mind. Even worse, ideas of ending my unhappy life wormed their way into my confused thought process. I looked into the mirror once more and the words “I don’t even know myself” tumbled from my lips. That was when I heard my mother’s phrase repeated clearly and distinctly in my mind: “Remember who you are!”

I can describe that moment only as enlightening. For the first time, I realized what my mother’s message meant: it was her plea for me to remember my divine heritage."

Interestingly enough, I had a similar experience to this anonymous author. I recall during my time in Young Womens,  especially during my high school years, my mother almost without fail would say to me, “Meri. Remember” every morning before heading off to school. I, unlike the author, questioned my mother when I first heard it, stating, “Remember what?” At that age I was quite forgetful and my head was racing with what it was I had potentially forgotten. My loving mother smiled and informed me that I was to remember I am a Daughter of God. I smiled, while keeping to myself my smart remark of, ‘I already knew that, Mom.” Yet like the author, that constant reminder proved beneficial years down the road when I had lost my way for a time. AS you can see, that constant reminder of who I was helped me lead back to where I am now.

This author then continued on to list ways we can learn and be reminded of our divine heritage:

"To help us combat our trials, Heavenly Father has given us tools for increasing our understanding of our divine heritage. We have the scriptures, which show us how others have recognized their roles as sons and daughters of God and have acted accordingly. The Lord Jesus Christ is the perfect example of one who understood His divine heritage. The scriptures tell us that in His youth He “increased in wisdom and stature.”. The more His understanding grew, the better prepared He was to fulfill His role as the Savior of the world.

We have the prophets, who teach us about our divine nature and potential. We have the priesthood, which enables us to receive inspired blessings that affirm our relationship to Heavenly Father. We have temples, where we may participate in instructive and sacred ordinances. We also have the means for direct communication with Heavenly Father through prayer. This can help us during those times when we forget who we are."

The things this author listed were the same things I had listed when I was brainstorming ways we can remember who we are especially in regard to the Prophets. I don’t think there is a  single conference that goes by without one or more reminders of our divine heritage from our Prophet, Apostles and all the leaders we receive guidance from.

There was one thing she didn’t note that I felt was equally important was that of our songs and hymns. One of them we learned in Primary and is an ever constant reminder throughout our life that we are all God’s children. “I am a Child of God.” That simple phrase iterates who we are while reminding us the importance to seek, learn and grow in the gospel throughout the three verses and chorus. Another is song that I love is a Child’s Prayer where in the 2nd verse, who I felt was the voice of a parent answering the child’s plea, saying, “Pray, he is there. Speak he is listening. You are his child. His love now surrounds you.” These songs may be intended for the primary children, but the meanings of the words are just as important for us to remember so we won’t forget who we are.

As you can see, there are plenty of constant reminders in our lives that help us ‘remember. Unfortunately it is not a complete safeguard against the trials and temptations that will rise up against us. Our testimony of being children of God will help strengthen us in those times of adversity, but often we will find ourselves faltering. So a second way to help us remember the Savior wants to forgive us is by remembering, that though we may sin and make mistakes, we have a brother and father in heaven who love us dearly. The greatest manifestation of this love was given to us by our Heavenly Father and brother Jesus Christ. Heavenly Father, all wise and loving, provided a way in which we can be forgiven so we can return to live with him again. He sent his son, our brother, Jesus Christ, to atone for us.

In the pamphlet True to the Faith, under Atonement, we read:

"The word atone means to reconcile, or to restore to harmony. Through the Atonement of Jesus Christ, we can be reconciled to our Heavenly Father. We can ultimately dwell in His presence forever, having been “made perfect through Jesus” (see D&C 76:62, 69).

Jesus Christ “was prepared from the foundation of the world to redeem [His] people” (Ether 3:14). In the premortal spirit world, Heavenly Father presented the eternal plan of salvation, which required an infinite and eternal Atonement. The premortal Jesus, then known as Jehovah, humbly declared that He would do the will of the Father in fulfilling the plan (seeMoses 4:2). Thus He was foreordained to carry out the Atonement—to come to the earth, suffer the penalty for our sins, die on the cross, and be resurrected.(Revelation 13:8; see also 1 Peter 1:19–20; Moses 7:47).

The Atonement is the supreme expression of our Heavenly Father’s love for us (see John 3:16). It is also the greatest expression of the Savior’s love for the Father and for us"

The pamphlet goes on to explain in depth the Atonement, but I like how in the introduction it informs us of what it does and why it was done. The last two sentences particularly highlight why it is the Savior voluntarily atoned for us: It is because he loves us and therefore wants to forgive us. Elder Craig A Cardon spoke about this in his talk given in April’s General Conference. He highlighted one of the important things about the atonement that we must do in order to receive his forgiveness. He says:

No one need suppose that this forgiveness comes without repentance. Indeed, the Lord has declared, “I, the Lord, forgive sins unto those who confess their sins before me and ask forgiveness.”.”24 While the Lord“cannot look upon sin with the least degree of allowance,”25 yet He differentiates the relative gravity of some sins. He declares the gravity of murder and emphasizes the seriousness of sexual sin such as adultery.28 With regard to repeated serious sexual sin, He makes known the increased difficulty of receiving His forgiveness.29 And He has said that “he who sins against the greater light shall receive the greater condemnation.”30 Yet, in His mercy, He allows for improvement over time rather than demanding immediate perfection. Even with the multitude of sins occasioned by the weakness of mortality, as often as we repent and seek His forgiveness, He forgives again and again.31

In this forgiveness we see the enabling and the redeeming power of the Atonement harmoniously and graciously applied. If we exercise faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, the enabling power of His Atonement strengthens us in our moment of need,14 and His redeeming power sanctifies us as we “[put] off the natural man.”15 This brings hope to all, especially to those who feel that recurring human weakness is beyond the Savior’s willingness to help and to save.

What a wonderful gift our Heavenly Father has given us. He knew we would falter for this is our time to learn and grow. And because he cannot look upon sin with the least degree of allowance, our loving brother, Jesus Christ, offered himself, to take upon our sins. How fortunate we are to be part of an eternal family that has such love for each and everyone of us.

It is my firm testimony that as we remember who we are and how much the savior and our Heavenly Father loves us, that we can come to know that the Saviour wants to forgive us. He wants us to be happy and He wants us to come home. Repentance may not be easy nor painless, but through it we will find greater joy as we as we draw closer to our Heavenly Father. Let us learn from the past and not burden ourselves with guilt, but press forward in faith. I conclude with the 4th verse from hymn number 146 Gently Raise the Sacred Strain:

Holy, holy is the Lord.

Precious, precious is his word: …

Repent and live; Repent and live

Tho your sins be crimson red,

Oh, repent, and he’ll forgive. Oh, repent, and he’ll forgive.

I testify these things are true and would like to leave them with you in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen

Fun in the Sun!

The most excitement this week was had on Labor Day. I and Steven had the day off, so we spent the night at my parents Sunday night so we could head out bright and early with my family to Ocean Shores Monday. morning.

The beach was wonderful. It was warm, though cloudy. The sun did make an appearance which just added to the niceness of the beach and the coolness of the water. There was a mild rip tide going that when out jumping the waves kept slowly pulling me up the coast. Steven was the only other person to join me in the waters. Eventually we began to fight back the rip tide and while jumping ways slowly worked our way back to where we started. Grant it, we never went further than our feet could touch, so we weren't exhausting too much energy by trying to keep a float too.

There was one wave that just knocked me over silly. I knew it was big, but I thought I was gonna be able to jump high enough to break the top. Instead the wave crashed right down on me. For a moment a sense of panic kicked in, but amidst the watery embrace, I was able to get my feet back on the ground and stand back up through my tumbling. It was quite exciting though I know the dangers of loosing control in the ocean could be dangerous.

After playing in the water and having lunch, we all packed up and moved down the beach to do some horse riding. My mom, sister and I had to wait an hour for the next ride, but it was worth it. I wish we had slightly more freedom in where to go and how fast we could go, but the horse I had had enough spirit in him that I got a lot of trotting in, despite what the chaperons would say.

We then ended the day with some Red Lobster.

The rest of the week was work and me working on story writing. For those remotely interested in reading up on a game story, here's the website me, my family and friends write up our character's summary of what has happened. I have tried to keep mine written as much like a story as possible, but with the out comes of the next game unknown, it's tricky how to end a certain entry when I might be contradicting my character's thoughts with her actions. Anywho, like I said, for those interested, here's my character's story and from there you can check out the other's if you want.

Hope you are having a great week!

<3

It's Weeks Like This

Lately  for me it seems that something awesome or interesting to write about is happening about every other week. I try not to drone on with the same old, same old weekly things that I and Steven are up to, so when weeks like this come along where it was just church, work, and play, nothing being out of the ordinary, I tend to feel less inclined to write. I suppose I should try and figure out what else to write about in the mean time. If you have a suggestion as to something you'd like me to write about let me know and I'll try and use that in the next uneventful week I have.

I will leave saying that Steven and I are happy and healthy. Hope you all are doing the same :)

<3

Apollo Can Hunt

I wish I had a picture of what had happened, but last weekend I was outside dinking around with little Josh and while out there saw Apollo carrying a dead bird in his mouth. My initial thoughts were that he found a dead bird and decided to bring it home. So with that I figured I better check it to make sure it wasn't super old and rotten/diseased. He crouches down as I approach, as though he was trying to protect his 'catch' and as I reach down to grab the bird, I barely touch the feathers when suddenly I see TWO birds frantically flying away from Apollo, squawking the entire time. I was so stunned and surprised by what just left Apollo's mouth that I ran inside yelling to Steven about the awesome catch Apollo had. I could hardly believe that Apollo could hunt and catch a bird, let alone TWO! I'm sure he was quite upset with me for ruining all his hard work, but I'm sure the birds are thankful for me intervening. I do have to wonder how it was Apollo caught both of them... however it happened, it happened and it was quite awesome.

Other than that, I started my new job. I am a full time Nanny. It's been a great week and I love working with my baby girl. She's 3 months and has an older brother who goes to pre-school during the day. I've gone out once with baby girl and had fun getting oo'd and aw'd at. I look forward to the time when it's actually my baby people are awing at, but until then, I'll enjoy this little girl and her big brother. Her older brother is actually quite mellow for what preschoolers can be like, so that's super nice. I look forward to developing a better relationship with them and watching them grow.

I also got my first sunburn in a long time. Went to Ocean Shore's Monday with my friend Amilyn. It was sunny and warm and lots of fun playing in the endless ocean water and fighting the waves, but I forgot to reapply my sunscreen during our 3 hours of sunshine fun. It wasn't as bad as it could have been, but it sure was an unpleasant reminder to the efforts I've made over the years to never have to endure that pain and torture to my skin.

Hope everyone else is having a great week and enjoying the beautiful weather!

<3

Nightmare

Well, maybe more just a bad dream, but like I had mentioned last week I quite possibly have a new job. Actually the lady last Sunday night called and said, "We would like to hire you!" I'm excited and tomorrow is my working interview with her. So all week I've known I would be doing that and have had just a great week. Not that I was happy to be leaving my current job, I've honestly felt I've grown the most as a person and teacher while at the Giving Tree. The week itself was just simple and fun. So the fact I had a bad dream last night about my working interview tomorrow kinda threw me off this morning.

I dreamt that it was 7:30am Monday morning and knew I was running late for work, that is work at the Giving Tree. I check my phone and sure enough there's some missed calls from the Giving Tree. I call them and they ask me if I was coming in. I said yes and explained I was just running a little late. For some reason my parents were there and gave me a ride to work. It was about 8:05 when I got to work and as I walked it once more felt a wave of idiocy as I remember I don't start at 8 any more by 7:45. Well, that bit of forgetfulness was quickly forgotten about once I was in the Toddler room. My co-worker had a quizzical look on her face seeing me and though she never said anything, it hit me hard that today was the day I was suppose to be doing the working interview! I had the day off! Why was it I thought I had to go tot he Giving Tree and why did they call me to see if I was coming in!? Oh the agony of recognizing my error and worse yet is I didn't have a car I could just take off in while calling my soon to be new employer about my lateness.

I ended up calling the lady as I struggled to find quick transportation and in the end (despite my well chosen words to explain how sorry I was inconveniencing her like that and how it wasn't my character to make such a huge mistake) she explained how she's sorry this wasn't going to work out for her after all, but that because she did like me from the interview, that she'd be happy to write a positive review on my Care.com page.

By this time I wake up in a haze feeling very upset. How grateful I was to have reality seep back into me and realize it was just Sunday. So I'm kinda confused as to why I had such a terrible dream when I haven't been feeling stressed. Heh, maybe that is my mentality letting me know I am despite how much I've unknowingly suppressed it.

Anyways, that was the excitement of this morning. Like I said, it was a good week. My last day of work at the Giving Tree is this Friday the 9th. I'll have 4 days off before officially starting on the 14th (if nothing drastic happens at the working interview). I'll be a Nanny of 2 children. One is 4 and the other is just 3 months. I'll be the primary caregiver to the 3 month old since the 4 year old goes to pre-school 85% of the time, so it should work out nicely and I'm definitely looking forward to this next chapter in my life.

Hope everyone else has a great week!

<3

House Warming and Maybe a New Job?

This week was long, or so it felt. I attribute that to being sick most of the week. I had a sinus infection. Felt it start Monday, then it got worse until Friday when I woke up and felt distinctly healthier. I was so thankful because it really made for a great end to the week. No fun working while not feeling well, but not ill enough to stay home and rest up for most of it. Any who, my sinuses are still swollen or something, but the pressure that was there has pretty much ceased.

Friday I got to take my roommates kid to work with me. That was cool, though I suppose I now know what I'd be like if I actually had my own child there, well at least what I'd be like for the first few days. Constantly checking in and saying Hi. The good thing was the boy was having fun and engaging in the activities. He even took a nap (which I helped with when I went on my lunch just cuz I knew some of the other kids in that class were more difficult to put down and I knew the key thing to do to help him fall asleep anyways). So yeah, it was neat having a kid there I really new.

Saturday Steven and I had our house warming party. It was just a fun get together with my family and our friend Ann. Ate yummy food, let them check the place out, and then by the time that was done, we had enough time for some cards. I do wish family was closer, but I suppose that's what Steven and I need to focus on... making new friends and opening our home to new people.

Oh and how could I forget, part of the house warming was celebrating Steven's 26th birthday. His birthday isn't until Tuesday the 30th, but since family and friend was there already, figured it'd be a good time to add his birthday in with the festivities. So we enjoyed a pudding cake with vanilla ice cream. I actually accidentally scorched the top of the cake due to the new oven that I hadn't really used much in the month we've been here. The dial you turn to determine the temperature of the oven is the same dial that turns the oven on. But I didn't realize I had to turn the dial back the opposite direction to turn it off. So when I thought I had turned it to off, it actually stayed on broil! I had decided to leave the cake in the oven while it cooled off so it'd still be nice and warm when we ate it with ice cream. So yeah... 5 minutes later when thankfully I decided to melt the cheese on my burger in the microwave, I noticed smoke coming from the oven and quickly opened it up to find the cake burnt! I pulled it out and looked at the dial and saw it on broil. I thought at first I must have slipped, thinking I had put it on off, but it clicked back to broil when I looked away. And that was when I learned there is only one way to turn the knob to make sure the oven is off.

Like I said, the top was scorched, so my mum carefully peeled the top off and saved the cake ^_^ Wasn't as pretty looking, but oh well. It sure made for a fun story.

About to feed the missionaries! Enjoy your night and have a great week!

<3